Different persons gave different
answers to the question. Some said they will continue with the wedding plans
based on the reasons the guilty partner will render, others said they will quit
and cancel the wedding; while others were uncertain on what they will do in the
Speaking, Mormah Augustine, an
undergraduate in UNIBEN, said, ?I will postpone the wedding to see if it is
really true, because it could be a rumour and what led to it?. He believes that
the time of courtship is enough time to know each other and how much you love
each other. He says that during the time, the wedding will be on hold, while
investigations and negotiation will be going on to ascertain if she?s guilty or
not, and if she?s found guilty, the wedding might be cancelled. ?He said that if
she is repentant and asks for forgiveness, he will ask her to work on herself
and pray to God for forgiveness and insight, and at this time he too will be
praying. According to him, marriage is not an easy thing and getting a life
partner is also not easy, so he won?t be rash in cancelling the wedding but
would wait and give the lady time to repent because to start another
relationship is not easy. To him the only reason that will stop the marriage
after the postponement is if the lady is un-repentant. He advises partners in a
relationship to take time to study and know each other before marriage, because
after marriage, there is no more second party.
Another person, Miss Ideh Joyce,
a graduate of DELSU, Abraka says that for the wedding to continue, it depends
on the extent of their love and the seriousness of his other affair. If the
other relationship is such that he is already married to the lady, then she
will quit her marriage to him but if it is not that serious, they will reach a
consensus that he will drop the lady before the wedding. She said that even
though she will be angry and blame herself for not knowing her partner well
enough to have discovered such, she will want the marriage to continue to save
the disappointment it will cause the family and invited guests.
According to Mrs. E.O. Ototo, ?If
I love him I will wed him because asking me to marry him shows he loves me more
than the other lady and so I will forgive him and ask him to discontinue the
Mr. N.S. Ogana, said that he
would cancel the wedding without thinking about his love for the woman, or her
reason for doing what she did, or even the embarrassment that it will cause the
invited guests, because a broken engagement is better than a broken marriage.
For him, the wedding will be cancelled not because of the other relationship
but because she?s not trust worthy.
?If he met her first I will quit,
but if he loves me more I will not. It takes the grace of God?, says Miss Uche
As regards the issue, Mr. Chinedu
Udeh says sternly, ?I will stop the marriage?.
Mr. Francis Vincent stated that
he will not do anything about it but will try to understand what?s going on by
asking his fianc?e questions. Thereafter, he will advise her and will continue
with the wedding.
Cynthia Memeh said she will find
out if the other relationship is more serious than hers. If it is so, ?I will call off the marriage. I
am presently experiencing a similar situation in my relationship and I discovered
that he loves the other lady more, so I quit the relationship?, she said. She
advocates that love does not hurt and so for someone you love to do a thing
like this, shows he doesn?t love you and so the marriage can?t be successful.
Mr. Ogboi S.O., a middle-aged man
and a security officer at the College
of Education, Agbor said that occurrences in Nigeria could make one commit
suicide. He said that he will see if the woman is still interested but if she
is not, then he will go on with his life. According to him, ?it is not a do or
die affair?. When he was questioned on the issue of multiple partners, he had
this to say: ?if it comes to multiple partners, I will run for my life and
Dear readers, the take home gift
I have for you, is that you should be very watchful and prayerful in your
relationship and make sure that your relationship is based on love, trust, the
fear of God, understanding and respect for each other.